"As Seen on this Blog"

As you may or may not know, I have a love/hate relationship with companies like Pampered Chef and Bed, Bath and Beyond. These businesses are constantly trying to sell things to the consumer that are both arbitrary and redundant. I try to live a minimalist life style; therefore, I don't need my kitchen to be bogged down by garlic presses, citrus juicers and apple corers. I do own a knife and a set of "hands" (patent pending) that have been working pretty well for the majority of my simple life.

However, I would love to own a machine that can shred chicken. Despite the fact that I own both a fork and a set of "hands" (patent pending), I just effing hate shredding chicken. If a recipe calls for shredded chicken I will usually cube the meat or just not make that stupid dish. Sadly, the majority of Mexican food calls for some kind of shredded meat and even sadder, I love Mexican food. So, you see my dilemma.

Things I hate include:

Hitler
Cats
Satan
Navient Loans
War
HGTV
Shredding Chicken

Can you put a chicken breast thru a paper shredder? Or maybe, a wood chipper would work better? I will be sending these questions off to my Research and Development (R&D) department. Product testing and consumer polling will take place shortly after the R&D phase. Be on the look out for the "Shredder" thru "As Seen on this Blog" not "As Seen on TV"...those people make garlic presses, and possibly war...but, definitely garlic presses.