Thursday, November 15, 2012

Planet of the Apes

A recent study found that when monkeys groom each other it releases endorphins and all sorts of happy feelings in the monkeys. I believe that this is also true for humans as well.

As a female, there are certain things that I understand about my sex and yet other things that allude me. Men and women purchase things based on very differing criteria. Women base most of their purchasing decisions on what looks good and makes them feel good. Men purchase based on what they absolutely need and most other things are superfluous. Now, keep in mind; men will purchase speed boats and electric guitars that they don't actually need but when they do make those purchases they base their decision on brands and models not by aesthetics but by function over form. When women make these purchasing decisions they do so based on appearances or form over function.

With that being said let's get back to those adorable poop slinging monkeys! I have never understood why women go to salons to pay $100 for their hair to be colored when they can do it at home for $4 and probably do a better job than the actual stylist. Why get a manicure when you can paint your nails at home for the price of the nail polish? Why pay for a massage when your husband/significant other will do it for the price of a blow job? caveat - I'm pretty sure that is also prostitution but I won't tell if you don't.

The bottom line is this: When a woman goes to a salon, she isn't going there to get her hair colored or her nails done. She's going there and paying money because it makes her feel good. It's not necessarily about the end result but more so about the experience and those relaxing endorphins that come with it.

I still can't say that I agree with spending that much money at a salon but at least I can now say that I understand it.

And in an effort to save money and time, I will be purchasing a chimp to do all my grooming; not for free but for a few bananas.