Thursday, August 13, 2015

Let's Go Ice Skating, Covered in Mud!

Why are all activities now covered in mud? Mud runs, mud zumba, mud soccer, mud ultimate Frisbee, mud kickball, mud, mud, mud, mud! The obsession with mud is totally lost on me. I like to be clean and am kind of a germophobe. It is difficult to understand the mentality behind the family of four getting together one evening and discussing the possibility of waking up at 7am, on a Sunday, to run for 3.5 miles in 95 degree weather all while covered in sticky, hot, wet, earth. THE PERFECT SUNDAY!!!! The real insanity here is that you have to PAY MONEY in order to participate in this navy seal level of fun. Have these people never heard of Netflix? Or brunch? Or Mimosas? Not to mention the fact that before said mud (insert activity) you will also have to purchase brand new clothes for the purpose of being totally destroyed after this mud exercise.

So, in short, here is the break down:

Pay money to participate in mud activity
Buy new clothes to ruin during your mud activity
Wake up at 7am, on a Sunday
Run in mud
In crippling heat
Spend rest of day cleaning wet dirt out of EVERY orifice your body has to offer

I just don't understand the appeal.

Therefore, I would like to start the first annual "White Linen Suit Run (In air-conditioned building)". All proceeds will go to Germophobes Anonymous and our sponsors will include Lysol, Swiffer, Clorox and Dove. Refreshingly cool mimosas will be served directly after the finish line.

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