Thursday, June 5, 2014
When in Rome, Eat a Hot Dog and French Fry Pizza
What is authentic? If I want to dress up as Batman, on a daily basis, is this unauthentic because I am neither man nor bat? If I put dreads in my hair, is this unauthentic because I am neither Jamaican nor Rastafarian? My heart is in an authentic place so I feel like these count? My heart is also drunk most of the time so I try not to listen to it. The last time that I "Followed my heart" I ended up at a Styx concert and eating pancakes at 2 a.m. from IHOP, which stands for, "I Hate these Overly-expensive Pancakes". Did I mention that I hate IHOP? I hate IHOP; now you know.
I can only assume that everything in Italy is authentic because it is made by actually Italians. Yesterday, I watched in horror as a child ordered a french fry and hot dog pizza. No I am not making this up. If you ordered this at a Chuck E. Cheeses, you would assume that a middle aged man wearing a giant rat costume came up with this idea while extremely high and possibly drunk. It's the kind of thing I wouldn't eat in public for fear of hipster judgement and not being "authentic". In times of doubt I turn to philosophy and religion. What would Jesus do, you ask?
I Corinthians 10:23 KJV "All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient : all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not."
I feel like a french fry and hot dog pizza does not edify but I will not judge you for eating this truly authentic, Italian made, pizza because "Judge not, that ye be not judged." Matthew 7:1 KJV.
Holy pope emperor this blog just got religious! I take my food seriously, religiously! Pizza in Italy may be authentic but it doesn't mean I have to like it. Italy is home to Christendom and Pizza; some of it is authentic and some of it is just for tourists